We all know how much I love 311 and yes, I'm at it again with a particular song that has struck a chord with me lately.
I'm in love with "Two Drops in the Ocean". I have been finding myself spending a lot of time reflecting on a million and one things lately. I've been thinking a lot lately about my late grandparents (my mom's mom and dad), my uncle Randy, and my step-grandfather. Each of them have all meant something very special to me. So, in a way..."Two Drops in the Ocean" reminds me of them. I especially relate to the line "You're something of a different kind. The rest evaporate, but you stay in my mind" when I think of my grandparents, step-grandfather, and my uncle Randy. Maybe it's because I miss my grandfather's stories, his laughter, his smile, and everything in between. Maybe it's because I miss my grandmother's hugs, her advice whenever I really needed it, and just well...her in general. Maybe it's because my uncle Randy was seriously one of the best uncles ever (aside from my uncle Robert and uncle Ron). I can still hear Pink Floyd's The Wall playing while Randy worked on cars. So now every time I hear Pink Floyd, I immediately go "how's it going Randy!!!"...it's kinda hysterical, actually. I'm sure Styven's thought at some point that I've really gone insane. I see golf carts (or anything golf related) and I start remembering how my grandparents dragged me along during the summers to go golfing. At the time when I was a child, I never understood the whole point of being toted along, now I just smile and laugh at how lucky I was to even just have that time with them...even if I'm not a huge golf fanatic. I know that whenever I see anything golf related or whenever I see boats, fishing, or anything that has to do with the ocean, I'll think of my step-grandfather. Though he's not my biological grandfather, my step-grandfather has always treated me, my cousins, my mom and her siblings, my kids, and my husband like we were his very own. Though he's still with us, I miss him so very much.
I have also been thinking about how we live, we learn, we grow, and we move on. So much easier said than done...but there is truth to that. I have come to the realization that life is an ongoing learning process and that everything happens for a reason. Some things come easily, others do not. I think it's how we grow and what we learn from it. I just have to say that I absolutely love my pastor's wife! She always hits the nail on the head and always says what I need to hear, the moment I'm needing to hear it. She said something the other day on negativity, so it got me to the current thought process I've been having lately. Negativity is really not good for the soul and it's not good to harbor things and let them eat at you. They say that resolutions are rarely kept for more than a month or two. I wonder if it's because we fail to set up goals that are truly attainable and easy to keep. Don't get me wrong, I think that it's great to challenge others and yourself, however, I think it's all in starting small and not over-doing it. With that being said, my resolution was to try not to take certain people or certain things so seriously/personally and to learn to let go. Both things have been insanely hard for me to do, but it's a work in progress (holy snappers, that's like 13 years in the making ::looks away and smirks::). I have heard it said that the art of letting go is a difficult process, but in the end letting go is a beautiful thing.
Now on with some random updates.
Styven and I are getting more and more excited for Vegas as the days go by. This is going to be Styven's first time ever in an airplane. I already told him that I'm very OCD and have to have the window seat, otherwise I'll panic and go insane for the entire flight. He laughed and made some silly, random comment. What can I say, we never have a dull moment together.
Charlie was home sick all day today with strep and with the stomach virus. Danny went to school all by himself today. Both boys are making great progress at school. It's hard to believe that they're 5 and speaking in complete sentences. They even know their alphabet and they're learning to write their letters. I think they're currently working on the letters L and M.
I hope that everyone had a great holiday (Christmas or Hanukkah, whichever you celebrate) and a lovely New Year.
XOX
Shoga
18 years ago
